Some ideas that could foster “calming down” (#27)

  • “Neglect, unwillingness or opposition is one thing; lack of ability or self-confidence is different”.
  • “Anxiety (or feelings of inadequacy) usually interferes someone’s performance and skills”
  • “Express or repress (or supress): Hiding anxiety may make anxiety worse”
  •  “Being really understood is the best antidote for anguish, distress, and anxiety”
  • “Stating someone’s overt behavior is easy; understanding the underlying intention or state of mind can be more difficult”.
  • “Everyone may have a particular way of experiencing reality; without listening what’s going on for the other, there’s no way of understanding or helping the other”
  • “Empathy is the beginning of change”
  • “First you need time and help to put yourself together”
  • “Parental demandingness is not enough; warmth and sensitivity are also key for kids to flourish”
  • “Self-efficacy beliefs are key to perform well”

Some ideas that could foster “Exercising inner control” (#1)

  • “My child rejects outer control (maybe he wants to learn how to self-control)”
  • “Her misconduct is a form of protest against maltreatment”
  • “Controlling oneself is not easy: it requires a lot of practice and support”
  • “Children have a natural need/desire for autonomy”
  • “Her protest is a call for help”